An angel at my graduation....

My name is called at Graduation, I walk up to the steps that seem so steep. I slowly creep up the steps trying not to stumble. Nervous, hundreds of people watching, all eyes on me. I finally step over the last step, a sigh of relief I'm on flat ground again. I approach the principal as he reaches out his hand, I reach for my diploma with one hand and shake his hand with the other. I turn to look out into the croud, searching throughout the many people. She's no where to be found. My eyes start to fill with tears, I cant believe she's not here. I try to fight back the tears, but one streams down my face. Thats when a voice says into my ear," Robin, I am always here. Although my time has come, and I have passed, with you I will always be. Don't worry, I see you, it is you that cannot see me. Be assured, I will always be by your side, every birthday, holiday, and the day you are a bride. As I cant be on earth, an angel was sent to you to be where I cant be. Her name is Lynn, I chose her just for you. I know shes special, cause not only is she an angel, shes my sister too. I love you Robin, I just want you to know. I've seen you play, laugh and grow."After hearing my mothers sweet voice, I continue my walk with a walk of rejoice. A smile has crossed my face, to know my mother is watching that day. In loving memory of Tera Star Stevens 08/09/1966-03/14/2001

The same life, a new beginning.

The same life, a new beginning

I was a lost kid from birth. I grew up a lost kid, and I thought I would be lost my whole life. That changed the day I met a certain man. This is the story of how I found my new beginning, how I found myself and where I belonged.

My freshman year of high school I moved in with my sister and her family. I babysat my niece and that was my reason for living with them. As I said before I was a lost kid, I had experienced many hard times in my life and I was very unhappy with life. I was very hard on myself all the time, I felt ugly, stupid, worthless, and unloved.

Growing up I was often made fun of, but not for the same reasons as most kids. I’m not exactly sure why I didn’t fit in. After all of the negative comments from the people around me I started believing them. I was so unhappy that at a young age I was depressed. Another hard thing to understand is why someone’s mother wouldn’t want them. In some cases maybe the mother is too young to care for the child, or just simply just doesn’t want any kids. But my mother’s reason was different. She was unable to care for me.

I was not her first child, but to my knowledge, I was her last. My mother was in her mid-twenties when I was born. I couldn’t tell you much about my mother except very little memories and the many things my family told me about her. The reason for this, my mother’s sister, Lynn, got temporary custody the day I was released from the hospital. My mother was unable to care for me because she had a disease; she was addicted to drugs and alcohol.

Lynn raised me pretty much from birth. I do not know who my biological father. I saw my mother, but rarely. I hold dearly to the few memories I have of her. Like any other person I long for the relationship we could have had. But to get through life I can’t rest on the past that can’t be changed. I must look forward to the life I can have. Many times I find myself wondering what life would be like if we were a normal family, if my mom was healthy and I had a mom and a dad. But then I remember that everything happens for a reason and if that were my life I would not have the many experiences I have and have gotten to meet the many great people I have met.

I’ve had a rough life, but so have many other people. I used to wish I was dead. I didn’t see a purpose in life. I questioned if I would ever be happy. And slowly I realized that I would never be happy if I didn’t do anything about it.

While I lived with my sister I attended church with her. I enjoyed church. I have gone to church on and off my whole life. I was spiritual but I never stayed committed. I was never ready until my sister, her family and I attended a new church, called center pointe. This church was a whole new world for me. The people were accepting no matter your story. It was an enjoyable environment that could make your whole week better just by going on Sundays.

I decided one Sunday that I was so touched by the message that I wanted Jesus in my life. I wanted to live for Him and I wanted to receive His eternal happiness. I got saved that day. I finally found the “Father” I thought I never had. I finally had a peace in my life. The blessings continued as the following summer I was baptized.

My walk a young and new Christian was hard. Like any other human, I made mistakes. I slipped off the path a couple of times, but I looked to God for guidance and it was guidance that He gave me. No one is perfect and we all fall short of the glory of God, but I wanted to do better. To this day I still strive to be the best Christian I can be. Its not easy but me and many other Christians walk the same path for God. It’s a walk on a tight rope totally on faith. But with the help of our Heavenly Father, we can arrive to the other end of the rope safely.

“Now hope does not disappoint, because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us.” – Romans 5:5

A new me.

I have made many mistakes in the past but those mistakes have taught me many things. The main thing I learned was that some people are put on this earth to teach you a lesson. I have learned my lesson. From now on I am going to be a changed person. I am raising my standards and I'm setting higher goals. I'm going to strive to be happy with life. I'm going to strive to have jesus shine through me. I want to feel beautiful and confident. My mistakes have changed me and for the better. I'm now stepping out as a new me! I'm striving to be an independent woman who is very dependable and giving.

trying to see if this

trying to see if this works...

A piece of my heart

A piece of my heart is still with you!

by you my heart was ripped in two.

Stuck with the pain and sorrow,

while you live life like there's no tomorrow.

Getting over one you loved is extremely hard to do,

but it was an easy thing for you.

You act like all the memories meant nothing.

But to me, the memories mean something

Something that will never fade,

I think about you everyday.

Someday I will be over you,

but until then, I'll always love you!

By: Robin Mize

5/26/09

The Purpose of Life (edited)

The Purpose of Life
By: Robin Mize

“We have not come into the world to be numbered; we have been created for a purpose; for great things: to love and be loved,” as stated by Mother Teresa of Calcutta. Everyone has a different purpose. Whether it is being a youth pastor and preaching the Word to teens or being a talented singer and bursting into songs of praise, God has a plan for us all. I may not be one to get up in front of a crowd and preach, or one to belt a tune, but God has a plan for me here on earth. To this day, I still am unsure of what exactly my purpose is.

I feel as if everyday has a purpose and everything happens for a reason. My hope on earth is to positively influence my peers and spread the Word of God. One of the main ways to reach my goal is to become a Chemical Dependency Counselor. For a while now it has been a dream to go to college in that field because one, I am passionate about helping people overcome chemical addictions.

Throughout my life, I have been around many people who are/were chemically dependent. People who were very dear to me have passed away due to drugs and alcohol abuse, and I want to help change people’s lives before it is too late. Through Chemical Dependency Counseling, I can bring lost souls to Christ. I hope to help improve the lives of many. If it were not God’s plan for me to have the career of Chemical Dependency Counseling, I would find another way to touch the lives of many. Being a strong Christian and showing Christ through one’s actions is a way to bring people to Christ. If that is what God’s plan for me is, then that is what I’ll have to do.

A goal is the result or achievement toward which effort is directed. I do not have many, but the few I do have are important. Some have what is called a bucket list, a list of things one wants to accomplish before they die. I tried to make a bucket list and failed. I have main goals though. My number one goal I want to achieve is to bring someone to Christ. My second goal is to strive to be the best Christian I can be.

People are put on earth for a very important purpose, although most do not know Christ and do not know the meaning of life. Some know Christ; they just have not found their purpose yet, like me. But I continue to journey to find my purpose and to fulfill my goals with the grace of God. I hope that it be his will. Come to think of it, I am more certain of my purpose than I thought. If I just follow my goals and live for Christ everything else will fall into place.

The purpose of Life(american lit paper) [please read and criticize]

The Purpose of Life

By: Robin Mize

It is very important to think about the purpose of life. Everyone has a purpose. Everyone has a different purpose. Whether the purpose is being a youth pastor and preaching the Word to teens or being a wonderful singer and singing songs of praise, God has a plan for us all. I may not be one to get up in front of many teens, or one to belt a tune, but I have a significant purpose here on earth. To this day, I still am unsure of what exactly my purpose is.

I feel as everyday has a purpose and everything happens for a reason. My purpose here on earth is to positively influence my peers and spread the Word of God. One of the main ways I want to spread the Word of God is to become a Chemical Dependency Counselor. For a while now it has been a dream to go to college in that field for many reasons. I am passionate about counseling people who are chemically dependant.

Throughout my life, I have been around many people who are/were chemically dependant. People who were very dear to me have passed away with the cause of drugs and alcohol, and I want to change people’s lives before it is too late. Through the Chemical Dependency Counseling, I can bring lost souls to Christ. I hope to fix the lives of many. If it were not in God’s plan for me to have the career of Chemical Dependency Counseling, I would find another way to touch the lives of many. Being a strong Christian and showing Christ through one’s actions is a way to bring people to Christ and if that’s what God’s plan for me is, then that’s what I’ll have to do.

A goal, the result or achievement toward which effort is directed, I don’t have many but the few I do have are important. Some have what is called a bucket list, a list of things one wants to accomplish before they die; I tried to make a bucket list and failed. I have main goals though. My number one goal I want to achieve is to bring someone to Christ. My second goal is to strive to be the best Christian I can be.

People are put on earth for a very important purpose, although most don’t know Christ and don’t know the meaning of life. Some know Christ; they just haven’t found their purpose yet, like me. But I continue to journey to find my purpose and to fulfill my goals with the grace of God. Hopefully it be his will.

Today I was assigned to write a paper about the purpose of life and the goals I want to achieve, for once i was actually really excited to write it. lol. So i sat down and spilled my thoughts. it had no minimum or maximum for the length, let me know what you think before i turn it in.

Pain

Pain

This pain is creeping over me.

Slowly coming and attacking.

Never know when is approaching.

Only know that its hurting,

Me and everyone around me.

Consequences, it brings with its suffering.

After hurting ones I adore.

This pain I can endure no more!

Today is the day

The pain goes away.

Today I vow for happiness to come.

And for happiness to never stray.

For this is the day that the Lord has made.

I will be glad and rejoice in it.

For once I will be happy again.

 

Everything Happens For A Reason?

I feel very strongly about the saying "Everything happens for a reason.” I believe that everything does happen for a reason. But I also believe for every action (choice/decision) there is a reaction (consequence). For example say someone makes a bad decision they must pay the consequences for that choice. But, it happened for a reason! God may be trying to show you that you need a change of heart (don't say that too fast lol).

If everything happens for a reason, should those choices be regretted? I think regret is a type of a strong burden that many people hold. We should feel sorrow because of sin, but God's will is a repentance that is "without regret." Regret is often felt when someone feels sadness, shame, embarrassment, depression or guilt after committing an action or actions that the person later wishes that he or she had not done. A burden is a heavy weight that is difficult to carry. Metaphorically it refers to anything difficult or troubling. I think that bad choices should be regretted in a way, you should know not to make the mistake again but your regret shouldn’t be burden and get in the way of your relationship with God.

Seeing yourself as God sees you!

Many people have low self-esteem, caused by many things like negative people putting them down or feeling bad for past mistakes.

Well God is an AWESOME, forgiving God and once asked for His forgiveness all of your ugly actions and decisions are FORGOTTEN.

God sees you as a beautiful person, see yourself as He sees you.

If you are having a hard time or feeling down, look in a mirror and picture yourself as God sees you.

"Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.” - Deuteronomy 31:6


"Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." - Isaiah 41:10

"My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever." -Psalm 73:26

Happy Happy

happy birthday to me!!!!!!!!!!

My BDay Partayy!

Where: Diana and Scott's

When: April 10th 7:00 p.m. - whenever lol

BONFIRE!!!!!

contact me at ludacrisluva2010@yahoo.com or ilovesteve12_08_08@yahoo.com if you have any ?'s or to RSVP

hope to see you soon!

Help, my bday is coming up!!!

My birthday is april 7th, Im trying to plan my party.

I want to have my party at a park/lake and have a bonfire/cookout with all of my friends and family.

Where should i have it? It must have a place for a bon fire!!! lol

Please I need answes asap..thank you!

The adventures of Huckleberry Finn??!!!

ugh! this book is annoying. I am soo confused. I need help. If anyone has read this book please help.

I am answering questions on the book and I cant find the answers anywhere in the book or on the internet.

my first question is
What is Twain's purpose in inserting Sherburn's address?

Please help!

Who am I?

Who am I?

I think I am a or was a strong girl who didnt used to care what people thought, but lately people and their opinons of me have been bringing me down, knocking me out with every punch
I am a christian who is strong in her beliefs but doesn't really have the knowledge to back it up. Someone who can spit some stuff but has nothing to back it up.

Honestly, a really insecure person looking for others to help her be secure.

I am a girl that has an amazing family who loves her, an amazing bf who puts up with way too much, and amazing friends who stick with me through all of my drama.

Someone who needs much guidance from God, someone who keeps slipping off the path, someone who doesnt't know her way.

Lost in this big scary world and doesn't know what to do. Scared and alone, searching for guidance. I wish I could just open my heart to God like I used to. I wish I knew when he was talking to me. I wish I could hear him loud and clear, but it seems I cant hear him at all.

It's sad, people dont understand how much they need God and depend on him until they are knocked on their knees begging him to help them up.

Well I'm that person, on my knees begging for Guidance. Begging for Salvation, Forgiveness and Love.

People who say that they don't care what other people think are liars. Sooner or later it will get to them. It will tear them down. People have recently questioned who I am, what I believe in and most of all my relationship.

It hurts so bad that the people close to me that I love dearly dont see what I see, that people think that I dont know what true love is.

I may not have had very good examples of couples truely in love, but I do know what it is! I know how it feels to be in love and truly love someone. I love steve with all my heart, I have never loved someone the way I love him. He makes me feel so loved, he makes me feel like the most important person on this planent. We were there for each other when we were at our lowest and we give each other a purpose.

"Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant," - 1 Corinthians 13:4

"If you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, its yours forever. If it dosent, then it was never meant to be." This is the perfect quote for steve and I because we have gone through many troubling things and it has caused us to break up. Both times we have gone back out, this past time we both tried very hard to forget about each other and act like we didnt care about each other. Well we soon came to find that it didnt work. We loved and cared about eachother too much to do that. Everything happens for a reason, never regret your past. I dont regret anything we have gone through and I feel like God keeps us together, we are meant to be together and I wish my family could see how much we love and care about each other.

He has opened my eyes to who I am and who I can be. I am now a strong, christian who cares what others think but wont let it get her down, a girl who doesnt try to please everyone but trys not to give herself a bad name.

please pray!

If you will, please pray for me. The next couple weeks will be trmendously hard for me and I need your prayer. My whole world has been turned upside down and I'm so confused on who I am and where I'm supposed to be.

Your prayer will help greatly. Thank You and God Bless!

HI! this is a test.

HI! this is a test. im now posting from my phone :) how cool! =P

Help!

Anyone know a website christian teens can talk about worldly problems anonymously?

I think it would be cool to hear the problems of other christian teens and share my problems too, I could help other teens and ask them for advice.

The "IN" Crowd

The "IN" crowd could be a way to look at Christians. I see this in 2 ways.

• They will enter heaven if they are true and pure.

Therefore they are the "IN" crowd.

• there are many many Christians on Earth and the number continues to grow. I wonder how many of those "Christians" go to church and proclaim Christ as their Savior because

1. they think it's cool/the right thing to do.
2. they are made to by family/peers.

I'm not saying that proclaiming Christ as Savior isn't cool but it shouldn't be the only reason.

Faith is a thing you must have individually, something that you believe yourself. It's a good thing more and more are accepting Christ as their Savior, but they need to do it on their own, with their own faith in God.

blank/my weekend :)

I don't know why but I have nothing to write about. I really wish I had some amazing experience to write about that would blow everyone away but I'm blank.

I guess I can write about my weekend.....

well today is friday..duh..lol

• so I woke up
• got ready for school
• rode the bus with Julie(which i haven't done in a while)
• came to school
• I'm now at school ;) shh. lol
• when i get back to Diana's Scott, Julie and I are going for a walk :)
• I have to take some pictures of a park for my digital photography class
• then I will spend time with Scott Diana and Julie

Saturday

• I get to go see my dad!!!! YAY!! :D
• then I'm gonna go celebrate Scott's b-day with him :)

Sunday

• hmm.........i get to see Steve Sunday night at youth :)

Hopefully my weekend is pretty good.

From the inside out!

A thousand times I've failed
Still your mercy remains
And should I stumble again
Still I'm caught in your grace
Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
In my heart, in my soul, Lord I give you control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise become my embrace
To love You from the inside out
Your will above all else, my purpose remains
The art of losing myself in bringing you praise
Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
In my heart, in my soul, Lord I give you control
Consume me from the inside out Lord
Let justice and praise become my embrace
To love You from the inside out
Chorus 2x
Everlasting, Your light will shine when all else fades
Never ending, Your glory goes beyond all fame
And the cry of my heart is to bring You praise
From the inside out Lord, my soul cries out

I will go! Lord send me!

I was very touched by this song, and hope to spread the same feeling I felt and still feel.
This song amazes me...it reminds me that I need to live only for Jesus and live only to please him and no one else. I know I can finally be truly happy as long as I live for Jesus the rest of my life. Hardships come and go and still He remains. When a tragic event occurs the best thing to do is pray. God will shower mercy and grace on those who need it most. When life seems as it couldn't get worse, you may feel like you God most. But the truth is you need Him all the time. Don't ever forget how much you need Him. Without Him you would be nowhere, nothing. Its sad that we realize how much we need Him when we are knocked onto our knees. Its sad that we only go to Him when we can go no further. Love Him, appreciate Him, go to Him, praise Him, because He loves you and He deserves it. His love is unfailing, never ending, and unconditional. Looking for love, mercy, acceptation? Jesus is who your looking for. Jesus paid it all, all to Him we owe. Pay your debts to Jesus. Return the love He gives you. Share that love with everyone around you. Spread the love of Jesus.

Many are the sorrows of the wicked, But he who trusts in the LORD, lovingkindness shall surround him. - Psalm 32:10




I hope you enjoy. God bless.

Forest

Running through the forest with no one to help me find my way.

Trying so hard to make things the way they were back in the day.

Hating the way life is wishing i could relive the past.

Hoping I'll be forgiven fot the mistakes I made, the way I ruined us.

Running through the forest, realizing I'm just running in a circle.

Exhausted from all the running, I finally stop, kneel down and cry, tired from all the trying,

I say a little prayer hoping for a miracle. Thats the day I said "I cant live without you!"

DRAMA

Girls could not live without it

some just love to start trouble.

And when they do they get hated

its over rated.

Lies come out like oxygen.

enemies then friends.....again.

you think she's true then...

BOOM

she lies, starts drama and

CRASH

it starts all over......again.

By: Robin Mize

The true meaning of christmas

With christmas coming up everyone is running aroud frantic like a chicken with its head cut off.
Well i seem like ebenezer scrooge, but i like christmas. Its just i dont like it for the same reason as everyone else.

Christmas is supposed to be about spending time with the people you love. Its not about the presents.

Im not excited about christmas because this christmas just wont be the same without dad.

I will try to be happy about getting to spend christmas with the rest of my family with a roof over my head, but i will still feel a little sad on christmas day.

hope everyone has a wonderful christmas.
God bless

twilight!!!!

twilight premieres today!!!!

i cannot wait to see it!!!!

Twilight!

I am sooo excited about twilght coming to theaters in just 7 days.
I cannot wait to see it. I definitly reccomend the book series.

visit http://www.twilightthemovie.com/

TWILIGHT is an action-packed, modern-day love story between a teenage girl and a vampire. Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) has always been a little bit different, never caring about fitting in with the trendy girls at her Phoenix high school. When her mother re-marries and sends Bella to live with her father in the rainy little town of Forks, Washington, she doesn't expect much of anything to change. Then she meets the mysterious and dazzlingly beautiful Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson), a boy unlike any she's ever met. Edward is a vampire, but he doesn't have fangs and his family is unique in that they choose not to drink human blood. Intelligent and witty, Edward sees straight into Bella's soul. Soon, they are swept up in a passionate, thrilling and unorthodox romance. To Edward, Bella is what he has waited 90 years for - a soul mate. But the closer they get, the more Edward must struggle to resist the primal pull of her scent, which could send him into an uncontrollable frenzy. But what will Edward & Bella do when a clan of new vampires - James (Cam Gigandet), Laurent (Edi Gathegi) and Victoria (Rachelle Lefevre) - come to town and threaten to disrupt their way of life?

ABOUT TWILIGHT: Based on the #1 New York Times Best-Selling series with over 17 million books in print by Stephenie Meyer, TWILIGHT is a cultural phenomenon, with a dedicated fan base that eagerly awaits this movie. There are over 350 fan sites devoted to TWILIGHT, and it has been chosen as the New York Times Editor's Choice, a Publishers Weekly Best Book of the Year, Amazon's "Best Book of the Decade...So Far", Teen People's "Hot List" Pick, and The American Library Association's "Top Ten Best Book for Young Adults" and "Top Ten Books for Reluctant Readers," among others. Critically acclaimed director Catherine Hardwicke brings to life this modern, visual, and visceral Romeo & Juliet story of the ultimate forbidden love affair - between vampire and mortal.

negative feelings

Have you ever felt so put down that it seems that everyone is always saying something negative about you that brings you down?

I feel like today is that day for me.
I feel as everything is saddening. I feel like I can do no right.
like im working for no reason and that im just running in a circle and nothing to show for it and no appreciation.

I should be happy, I have a wonderful family, a house to live in, food to eat, an education, but for some reason I cant be.

I pray I can learn to look only at the positive instead of the negative.

**EXCLUSIVE**

i know i know..you are all thinking
"oh wow...Robin posted a blog...."
i know it rarely ever happens any more but I have exclusive news.

next sunday november 9th immeditely after the youth group chili spegetti dinner we will be watching a very touching movie that goes along with the series.

The exclusive movie is The Bucket List.


For small group this sunday we had to think of two things we would want to accomplish if we had 30 days to live.....one spiritual thing..and one fun thing.
my 2 things were convert someone and visit italy.

im really excited about the movie because I have never seen it and it will give me some ideas for my list.

cant wait ;D see ya then.

ABC's all about me

Airhead
Blessed
Crazy Christian
Ditz
Easily amused
Fabulous
Giddy
Happy
Incomplete
Jesus freak
Klueless
Loveable
Mischievous
Nerd
Optimistic
Playful
Quiet NOT!
Rebellious
Single!! xD
Tom boy
Under estimated
Violent
Weird
Xtra special!
Yummylicious
Zany


wow I never thought that I would be smart enough to know the alphabet! lol